A Life Well Loved
The last couple of weeks have been tough for our family. We have been dealing with a sickness that has been handed around the house that had me bed ridden for a couple of days. We have had what has to be a record number of snow and wind chill days off from school. I love my kids but when you’re all stuck inside, cabin fever becomes a real danger to mental and physical health. We learned that Niki’s grandfather, her Dad’s father, had been placed on hospice care. We managed to make it out to visit the weekend after we found out and then days later, he passed away. The following weekend, we braved a drive through the blowing and drifting snow to go to the viewing and funeral in the Metro-Detroit area. This has been the first day in a while where I have been able to get the kids off to school and really reflect on what all has happened over these long weeks. I don’t want this post to become about how difficult all of that was for us as a family, though it was. In these first hours that I have had to myself, I’ve really been reflecting on the life story of the man of God we celebrated this past weekend, Clovis Meixner.
As all of those who have been personally impacted by this great man gathered to celebrate the life of Clovis, we joked during the funeral about how the Meixner family may not be actual famous but they sure are Church of Christ famous. Clovis was an elder at the Rochester Church of Christ where his wife, Nanny Jo, was also very active in the life of the church. Clovis was looked to for wisdom, knowledge and his love of God and the church. I saw this first hand when I first started dating Niki during our time at Rochester College. We would come to church on Sundays and I would stand by as everyone would rush to Niki to catch up. People may not have recognized me but all I would have to say is, “I’m Niki’s husband.” and I went up a few notches on the social ladder.
So, why all of the fame for the Meixner name? I’m sure there is a major element in becoming an elder at a fairly conservative church that has to do with Clovis having believed the right things. Churches of Christ are pretty strict with their scriptural requirements for eldership and I’m sure that when Clovis was named to the elder board he checked each of those boxes off. He was a good man with strong beliefs and a powerful faith that matched it. The funny thing is that at his funeral nobody talked about any of those things. They didn’t talk about what he believed about baptism, congregational singing, how to apply the scriptures, or who can take communion. Instead, we all heard stories about his patience, his faith and most importantly, his love for people.
Matthew 22: 34 When the Pharisees heard that he had silenced the Sadducees, they gathered together, 35 and one of them, a lawyer, asked him a question to test him. 36 “Teacher, which commandment in the law is the greatest?” 37 He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the greatest and first commandment. 39 And a second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.”
I think we all believe these words of Jesus, in theory, but then we spend an awful lot of our time arguing and debating everything else. For me it took the funeral of a great man to bring this to light anew. I’m going to guess that Clovis, or Poppy as I knew him, disagreed on many different things when it came to the church and politics but I can say without a doubt that he loved me and I loved him. Poppy loved well. He loved his children who pushed his patience to its furthest limits, he loved his grand children, most of whom spent at least some time living with he and Nanny. He loved my children, even when he had to turn down the hearing aids a bit to deal with the noise. Listen, my kids are loud y’all.
We heard stories of the love Poppy displayed to others as he forgave time and time again. The love displayed as he put his retirement on hold to raise his daughter’s children. We heard of the love of a man who provided a safe, loving home to anyone who needed a place to stay. The love given to college students from out of state who were in need of a warm, home cooked meal instead of bland college cafeteria food. The dinner table was always full and always welcoming. No one left that funeral saying that they were inspired to believe the things about religion and the law that Clovis believed but everyone I heard did leave inspired to live a more loving life. I’ve been thinking this week about all of the people that we weren’t able to hear from at the funeral. About the stories of Clovis quietly loaning or giving money to people having a hard time making ends meet. The stories of those who hurt and disappointed Clovis for the nth time and the way they were once again greeted with a friendly, forgiving face. I think about the stories that remained unspoken of the people he encouraged, taught, and discipled. I think about the way that I am sure he was able to provide the right word at the right time to those placed under his care.
1 Corinthians 13: 13 And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love.
I love how Paul breaks it all down in this chapter. I think we spend way too much time talking about all of the other stuff. We talk about right understanding, right belief, right practice, etc. Here Paul tells us that none of that matters if we get love wrong. We can believe all of the right things and be nothing more than noise. In the end all we have to abide in us is faith, hope and love. I love that word “abide”. It means to act in accordance with… This was the picture of Poppy I am left with. He acted in accordance with love. You see, to abide in love you have to do more than check a few religious boxes. If love is only taking place in our minds we will reach a point where we no longer have the mental energy to act loving when adversity comes. Sound familiar? People who say they love, pointing to the scriptures that tell them to do so and then leaving an emotional disaster in their wake. Nobody follows after the man who preaches one thing and then lives out something that runs counter to that narrative. This was not the way with Poppy. At his funeral, we shared space with a whole bunch of people that saw the love of God lived out in Poppy’s life. Poppy loved well, and as such a strong testimony to his faithfulness, I think he inspired countless others to do the same. That, is a life well loved.