Pain and Promise — Plucking and Planting

I love my 8 year old son, Everett. I mean I am constantly amazed at how much love can come from even just watching him sit and read or try to figure out a problem. He's started playing soccer and I love watching this competitive and physically driven side of him come out in surprising ways. One thing does drive me crazy about him though. To be fair this isn't just something that drives me crazy about my son, it seems to be something that most kids in America do. It is a crazy attachment to tablets and video games. I think if we let him, he would never pick his head up from that tablet. He plays goofy little video games, watches videos of other people playing video games (that one is really strange to me), searches for funny pictures of Nyan Cat, etc. We have a rule with the tablet that he gets to use it for 1 hour every day and he can earn extra time by doing chores, reading, and other things we ask of him. The goal is that he is still participating as a member of our household and not some sort of electronic zombie. Many mornings Everett is given a choice about his tablet use. When he uses the tablet before getting in the shower I often ask him if he really wants to use his tablet time in the morning and not have any time in the evening, without earning that extra time, or save some of it for when he gets home from school. I can see the wheels start turning in his head as he weighs out these two possibilities and has to make a decision. I think it is moments like these, for my son, that are a training ground for a lifetime of this type of decision making. Whether we are aware of it or not, we are always weighing risk and reward, punishment and obedience, and pain and promise. There are certain decisions that we make that are more obvious and much less is at stake. We decide whether or not to go to work and the two sides may just come down to, if I go to work I keep my job and make money and if I stay home (for too many days in a row) I will get fired. We decide if we should take the back roads to work and possibly avoid the traffic jam. Some decisions have something to say about our health and well being. We decide if we should start going to the gym more often. If we go at least three times a week, change our eating habits and get better rest we will lose weight and start feeling better and if we don't, we won't. The challenge of that decision is that choosing to work out and eat right is hard. It is difficult to get up earlier and to change the way that you shop for food and drink more water, and not watch that late night television show but instead go to bed at a reasonable hour. What you have decided in your mind, if you are starting to work out, is that the reward is worth that challenge. You have placed health above comfort. Don't miss though, that your mind is playing that out over and over again. every time you wake up early, every time you pass Tim Hortons, every time you step on a treadmill at 5:30 am.

Big Pain, Little Promise

I read a tweet today from a megachurch pastor that said "what do you do when the pain is bigger than the promise". I think there is a lot going on in that tweet and I would not begin to guess what his intentions in writing it were but I think it speaks to the content of this particular post. Just like when you start working out or if you are my son and you are trying to decide whether you want to be bored now or bored later, a promise of a future has a direct impact on your decision making now. If the pain of what you experience now, i.e. muscle fatigue, boredom, or a job that is sucking the life out of you, is greater than whatever the future promise is, i.e. weight loss, future tablet enjoyment, or money to pay your rent, then you can't see that future clearly. You end up putting an end to what you are currently engaged in, no matter the cost. In terms of a future promise, specifically in the Christian tradition, an unhealthy view of this dynamic can be problematic. The problem with placing the Kingdom of God into just a future reality called "heaven" is that we leave people to wrestle out if the reward is worth the pain. Is it all worth it? Can I endure? People who wrestle with addiction or persecution are left feeling like, "this better be worth it". It's almost as if you fold within yourself, protect all sides, mark your territory, batten the hatches, and crawl into your fox hole until the war is over. This is not the Kingdom that we are invited to. If this is your mindset, I guarantee that when trouble comes, and it will come, you play this measuring game in your head. Is this eternal reward worth all of this? But if your concept of the Kingdom is something that is "already, not yet", "revealed, yet hidden" as Lesslie Newbigin says, you begin participating in a future reality now.

Now & Later

What would this Kingdom life look like in the now? Well for one thing, I think the pain that we face every day, the kind of pain that makes us question whether the future promise can be that great, would be lessened by the playing out of a future reality. A people who laugh together, who eat together, but also cry together, get old and die together. You wouldn't have to ask if it all is worth it because you would be experiencing the healing of a foretaste of that eternal promise. Your brother and sister, your neighbor, your co-workers and the guy in front of you in traffic, all start to become part of it. Each person is playing a part as you are being transformed into a true Kingdom citizen who no longer sees everything as risk and reward, pain and punishment, but just part of the struggle that we all get to go through together. We begin to realize that we can make it through this challenge too because we are not alone. I think it is part of the reason that it is often suggested that a person quitting smoking, or starting a diet or work out plan, gets one or two people to do it with them. There is strength in numbers. In the case of the Kingdom of God, I think it is actually the working out of our daily challenges, that God is orchestrating a creation from chaos, a way of being that IS that glimpse into a perfect promise. There too, there is strength in numbers.

And What of Our Enemies?

Most people can probably come aboard for the concept of this global community of people who suffer together, share with one another and participate towards a future reality. It sounds good, it's a Utopian fantasy that is fun to dream about. The real problem comes when we have to look at the words and life of Jesus. You see Jesus didn't just say to get together with your buddies and talk about how you're starting cancer treatment, or your spouse is thinking of leaving you, or that you lost your job and you think you are too old to start a different career. Being a global community when the globe is very small and just like you is much easier. The challenge is that Jesus says to love your enemies and to pray for those that persecute you. How do they fit in the "now" aspect of a Kingdom reality. The temptation is to say that they just aren't invited, they aren't a part of it. Once again, thanks to Jesus, we can't do that either.

There is a lot to think about on this topic so I don't want to seem to be a person that has it figured out. I admit that I am scared of people that are different than me. I don't really understand people that have a faith that looks different than mine. I am disgusted by some of the things I see on television in other parts of the world and the thought of loving those people is overwhelming. As I was writing this, a phrase came to mind that I think may signal a beginning into transforming of our minds towards that love of enemy. "I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy". It is often people in most extreme forms of pain that utter that phrase. I've heard it from people who have lost their children to addiction or illness. I've heard it from people who will have to deal with chronic pain for the rest of their lives. I've heard it from people who were wrongfully imprisoned or who live in a war torn battle zone. For some reason, the people who have experienced the worst kinds of pain imaginable, are the only people who wouldn't wish that pain upon another, even their worst enemy. This is the power of proximity. We must be located somewhere near pain. That can be pain in our own lives or near a people who experience pain in some way. There is something about coming along side a person who is struggling that transforms both of you. To see a person, even your enemy, in intense pain causes you to want to participate in their healing. And when your enemy becomes your friend in some mystical way by sharing this sacred bond, the question of whether or not it is worth it begins to fade away. It fades away because you aren't waiting for the promise, you are seeing it emerge all around you. That sound like good news. That sounds like the Kingdom that Jesus promised.